A few years ago I remember reading a newspaper article that included a funny letter written by a high school senior who had received several college rejection letters. I recently came across a copy of the letter and thought I would share it.
Office of Admissions
Dear Any College:
Having now reviewed the many rejection letters received in the last few weeks, it is with great regret that I must inform you that I am unable to accept your rejection at this time.
While I realize that, whatever you might read after that first sentence may be of little consolation, I would still like to clarify some points for you.
This year, I applied to a great number of fine colleges and universities and, of course, received many rejection letters. Unfortunately, the number of rejection letters that I can accept is very limited. It is for this reason that I was forced to reject the rejection letters of many qualified institutions.
This was not an easy task. Each rejection was reviewed carefully and on an individual basis. Many factors were taken into account, such as size of the institution, student-faculty ratio, location, reputation, cost and social atmosphere.
I am certain that most of the colleges I applied to are more than qualified to reject me. I am also sure that some mistakes were made, but I hope they were few in number.
I am aware of the disappointment that this decision may bring, for these were not easy judgments. Throughout my deliberations, I have kept in mind the importance to you of this decision. I wish it were possible to cite specific reasons for each of the determinations I have made but, frankly, it is not.
It was even necessary for me to reject some letters that were clearly qualified as rejections. This is surely my loss.
I appreciate your having enough interest in me to reject me, and, although it may seem inappropriate to you at this time, let me take the opportunity to wish you well in what I am sure will be a highly successful academic year.
See you all in the fall!
Applicant at Large